Feminism; have we crossed the line?

WhatsApp Image 2018-02-16 at 02.17.16

WhatsApp Image 2018-02-16 at 02.28.06Lately, I have been viciously trolled on my decision to introduce myself as a feminist. Well, it has occurred to me that most individuals who identify as being feminist are apparently, bloodthirsty females who want nothing less than submission from men. Feminism has been viewed as a tool by women to take over the world and make it intentionally hard for men to survive. Incidentally, feminism lost its purpose when a woman got the lead seat at the business meeting and the corner office. Feminism has become a course for women to become whatever they like whenever they want. Every time someone texts me or walks up to me and says, ‘Anita, why? Why are you a feminist? It’s not fair to men’ I simply shrug my shoulders. So, where exactly is the line? Or preferably, what is the line?


Well, I have no problem with women seeking equality to men, I don’t get how offensive it can be to have fierce females. The one thing I do not seem to understand personally is whether society comprehends the definition of feminism as “the advocacy of women’s rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes.” For the longest time women have suffered from all sorts of abuse; FGM, rape, domestic violence, unequal pay, early and forced marriages, sexual trafficking, forced prostitution, illiteracy and so on. It breaks my heart that someone would have the guts to mention that these issues are backdated because these are still deeply rooted in our society. I am yet to meet a single woman who has not undergone any of the injustices I have mentioned above.




Yes, the least we can do is get angry and bitter about it. I admit some women have literally ridden the high horse with this and in the process cultured hate amongst the sexes. I always say this, as a firm believer and a genuine female – it is a man’s world, but it is nothing without a woman. I am less concerned about bringing men down just to elevate the women. I recognize the man the leader, the provider, and protector. Yes, I believe in submission as an act of love, and I don’t believe we can exist without men. I appreciate men, but that does not mean that they get away with social injustices to women. My kind of feminism has absolutely nothing to do with shaming men; I am all about uplifting women. I am more concerned about proper medical services for women and simply freedom than having a man suck my toes. In my opinion, the most men suffer from is a bruised ego, no offense, but we have paid the price for far too long.



I know equality is quite a vague subject because women and men can never be equals, especially physiologically. We ask for equality, then why do men have to settle the bills? Open the doors and buy us flowers? Are we merely being insatiable? What baffles me is how this is related to a woman having to suffer emotionally and physically for it. Yes, we can split the bill, I can open my door and what do I bring to the table? I brought the freaking table. I believe it’s time we all let our intentions be known; feminism is not a power sequel.
I am a feminist because I believe in women to achieve everything and anything they want. I want women to feel beautiful and worthy if you understand what I mean. So that part..I don’t think that’s feminism that’s just taking advantage of the situation.



I am a feminist, and for me, it’s more about things like FGM, marital abuse, rape, etc. have to end. I want to stand for women, and I want black women to feel beautiful in their skin and hair no matter where they are. I have my personal reasons for being bitter at men but what I am more interested in right now is to uplift the black woman. I want women to believe in themselves to understand what it is to have rights. That’s what I am about or would like to be known for. It’s not like if I have a son right now, I wouldn’t want the best for them. But I want to live in a world where gender doesn’t really define what you get out of life. I wouldn’t want my daughter thinking she’s better just because I’m a feminist or my son considering he’s less of a man just because girls rule the world. I just need balance in this crazy life. I am just a feminist. Cover_Seal-1019


14 thoughts on “Feminism; have we crossed the line?

  1. I must admit, when i read the topic put forward today my mind was racing with plain harsh and judgy (if there is a word like that) thoughts. I had points on my finger tips ready to unleash…. But i kept on reading… then calmed down halfway. After reading this i wouldn’t right away call you a feminist but an activist particularly for sensitive issues that men and women face every day. When my role as a man specifically providing is threatened i would start lashing out and the immediate person to feel the hurt would be my spouse. Anita there are ladies out there calling themselves feminist but they are all about calling men rapists and all sorts of names. Look for even more avenues to share this to the world.
    Really proud to know a lady of wisdom and high standards.

    1. Well, I am deeply flattered. I believe most women have misused the term and all privileges that come with it that has made it a terrible thing to mention. Thanks for your kind words.

  2. This piece is inspiring.Men and women can never be equal take even the biological compositions but that doesn’t mean that we should all never be provided with the same opportunities.Encouraging fellow women and young girls that they can achieve their goals in this complex world is crucial in making them believe in themselves and realising that they are not lesser beings than their male counterparts.I love the way you have put it down because people need to understand that being a feminist doesn’t mean that you lose respect for men but rather that you are promoting equality in terms of opportunities for women.
    Good job Anita.It is always inspiring to read your work

  3. I wish Maendeleo ya Wanawake could get leaders and thinkers like you.

    There’s feminism and there’s its cultured daughter, toxic feminism. Toxic feminism is exactly what’s dragging the efforts of feminists of good will back.

    The earlier women realize that and start tell themselves the truth without having to rely on people like Nyakundi who they apparently hate, the better.

    I love feminists even if sometimes I wish history would have written a different biological story.. Of men and women of old living without any forms of superiority. That chance is gone but the future is female. Let’s see how it comes through.

    1. I totally agree with that. The mantra that ‘all men are dogs’ isn’t true and most of the problems we face are sometimes self-imposed. We seek equality yet we are insincere in our reflection of the same. Thanks Phab.

  4. Long post aisee. I’ll admit that I didn’t read thr whole post but here is my view.
    I think feminism has been wrongly defined as -women- some women think that feminists are them that overpower the male.
    Its more about equality. Well, with the rise of toxic feminism I have personally learnt to despise these humans ?.
    Abuse comes either way. women have oppressed men but bc they are men, they handle shit like men. Some women advocate for FGM and all these weird cultural practices but if it comes from the man, it comes out louder.
    I think we need to address the female issues independent of male influence.
    You have said it well ma. Let us open the doors, buy flowers and PROPOSE! without the society bringing in the -whose role- BS
    I donno if I am pro boychild- or girlchild. but I know I am human.

    1. Yes, this is the issue we have and at this point I don’t know if I am still fit to identify as a feminist anymore..because I love men..who doesn’t and anyways half the problems we undergo as women we’ve simply invented them ourselves. Thanks Nicy.

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