Let’s Talk Insecurities

“Tell me somethin’, girl
Are you happy in this modern world?
Or do you need more?
Is there somethin’ else you’re searchin’ for? 

– Bradley Cooper ‘Shallow’

We live in a time where everyone seems to be having a perfect life, and they have their shit together. The unnecessary pressure to be fine, to be okay, to be like everyone else, makes us sell ourselves short. We suddenly realize we might not look as great or not be as flawless, and the overwhelming emotions soon creep up, and our insecurities take over. This ‘narcissistic generation’ has had a higher percentage of us having an obsessed sense of self. It’s so easy to fake a wholly sane and robust life online, but what goes on offline? The societal pressure to look and act in a particular manner makes a lot of people do tons of crazy things, and those who can’t afford it end up being completely stressed about it. What we forget is that people only post the good stuff, the perfect angles what they want you to see. Seeking validation on social media can also lead to some serious mental health issues including depression. Imagine dying because you didn’t get 10,000 likes, well, this literally happens in real life. We have seen many murders/suicides on Facebook live and so on. It is saddening that a person would feel so inferior and insecure to the point of feeling like nothing.

Silhouette Photo of Woman
Insecurities arise from so many sources: a traumatizing childhood, a relationship gone wrong, social anxiety, inferiority complex and so much more. Insecurities also come across in many forms: feeling unattractive, thinking someone is always watching your every move, having the urge to pretend to be someone else around other people, not feeling good enough and this may go to the extent of having some suicidal thoughts. The funny thing about insecurities is that they come from within, the tiny little voice in our heads that we are not good enough. Sometimes it even comes across as crazy when all that insecure people think about are the negatives. Insecurities are basically tumbling blocks between ourselves and the very best version of ourselves by ourselves.

Brown Sheep Plush Toy Near Tumbler
I have days where I just stare blankly at the mirror and feel like trash, when I don’t want anyone to see me because I feel not so interesting to look at.  Not sure. Not enough. On those days, I totally understand why Brittney had a breakdown back in 2007. Some days I roll out of bed with my day figured out and some days I forget every single awesome thing about me and judge myself too harshly. But at the end of the day, I remind myself that I am awesome and there’s someone out there who would kill to be me or with me.  Insecurities in their severest forms can cause one to totally lose their social standing. Lack of confidence can cause one not to go to a job interview, inferiority complex and social anxiety adversely affect friendship and other relationships. It’s okay to go through the emotions it’s human, everybody feels down sometimes, just don’t live in that moment for too long.

Body of Water
I think everyone has insecurities; something they’re not confident to address about themselves. However, some people are better at covering them up than others. I do not have a sure strategy as to how to overcome insecurities. I can only advise the importance of positivity, talking confidence to yourself and getting therapy. I am not as confident as I may seem to be, but every day when I look at myself in the mirror and affirm my being. I am surrounded by people who won’t hear nor condone any of my negative thoughts. Get yourself such people; friends who support you as you are and do not hesitate to compliment you always. Meditate, practice yoga and always pray for internal peace. You are not alone, never forget that. For those who barely have insecurities, you can make it easier for others by not making fun of them. Be kind, you never know what battles others are fighting! Have a beautiful insecurity free week!


(6) Comments

  1. Gloria says:

    Real talk, this one. Keeep some more coming

  2. Mitchelle Amenya says:

    insecurities are real and it’s good you brought it up…keep serving us reality checks girl

  3. Naomi says:

    Tip: The trick to dealing with insecurities is simple, “FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT.” Eg if I don’t have long hair and I really want it that much, I will buy a wig, Wear it till I feel it’s time to show of my long locks or something. ???. That one works for me a least.

    Real talk though. Insecurities are so real. It’s crazy how they can eat you up inside and manifest hideously.

    I feel like I should mention Woman Like me by Little Mix and Nicki Minaj….this is one song that makes all my insecurities literally fly away. Especially Pinnock’s part “insecure but working with it!”???
    Hope my tips help someone one there?
    Keep up the good job gal???

  4. Zippie says:

    This is great! Keep up. This is a meaningful topic.

  5. Faith Robina says:

    This is very relatable, so many people struggle with insecurities and its very important to have supprtive people around them.
    We truly live in a cold world.

  6. MaureenN says:

    Thanks you Anita for addressing the realities.

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